This one may be short-ish. Because: tired.
But let me say this. Last season, BEING MARY JANE lost me a little. I was watching to support – not because I couldn’t wait until showtime like Season 1. However-comma… the two-hour Season 3 premiere had me like, “Get it, y’all! It’s back! It’s back! Like that! *insert some grunts*”
I’m HERE for it again. Completely. Wholeheartedly. In the front row with bells on, shaking pom-poms and ish. Now let’s run this thang back.
S3, Ep 1: Facing Fears
- Y’all know Mary Jane found out that David and Lisa had sexual relations, which led to her car wreck.
- Welp. Both of their shady asses showed up at the hospital.
- When Mary Jane was wheeled out and saw David, she started swinging like hell. (Maybe her arms didn’t hurt after the wreck? She wasn’t sore? *shrug* Adrenaline’s a bitch. Perhaps she didn’t feel a thing once she saw his face.)
- Her dad asked David what the hell was going on, but he stuttered and whatnot, saying it was complicated. His level of pissosity went through the roof, and he hauled off and punch David in thee face. (Every girl wants her dad to punch a stupid boy in the face one good time.) Yay, Daddy MJ!
- In her hospital room, Mary Jane saw that Kara had covered her mirror. Why? Because nobody wanted to tell her that her face was on swolle and looked like it was caked with grape jelly. I promise I’m not being insensitive. I’m trying to paint a picture here. But hard-headed Mary Jane uncovered the mirror and looked anyway. No worries. The best plastic surgeon was on his way.
- Mama MJ was pissed at Dr. Disloyal (Lisa) because she “couldn’t say ‘no’ to one penis.” Out of all the good penises in the world, she had to have David’s. She read her so well, I was afraid we’d see another suicide attempt from her. No shade. Y’all know she’s a fragile soul.
- Mary Jane visited Driver Two/Cecilia/CeCe, played by Loretta Divine. She said she didn’t have insurance, which pulled at MJ’s heart strings. Before MJ left the hospital, she wrote her a check and had a nurse give it to her.
- There was trouble. Turns out MJ had alcohol in her system. Kara said she needed to pick up the phone and call her lawyer…STAT.
- What stood out? All her ex-boos were texting her, but none showed up. She was alone. She was recovering from a serious accident, and she was home alone.
- When someone knocked on the door, she was shaken. Enter…
THE BAT “Louie”
- It was her younger brother, PJ. He spent some time with her and dropped some knowledge about her relationship choices and thangs. I loved their convo.
- CeCe sat down with SNC lawyers to talk coins. She wanted double what they offered. She spit out statistics and warned that they didn’t want no problems from her. She was smaaaaaht. But this line right here though:
“Contrary to the myth, black people read.”
- Big bro Patrick showed up with Lisa in the car. He didn’t want her to kill herself, either. (He read my mind.) MJ approached her, bat in-hand, because that’s how she always answers the door now. Surprisingly, she flipped the script and apologized to Lisa because Lisa’s life is so jacked up. She was sorry …for all the guys who were uninterested in her. …that she couldn’t find a man to love her. …that she couldn’t really see Lisa b/c she’d have to look at herself and recognize that she, too, is unhappy. She pointed out that they haven’t been true friends in years – that their exchange was more like an obligation. She still loved, her but… Step off.
S3, Ep 2: Louie Louie
- Mary Jane’s lawyer was fighting hard to save her job. He wondered why they were making such a big deal about her having alcohol in her system. They brought up the fact that she keeps tequila at her desk. Eek! The network’s lawyer was basically like, y’all are trying to fight for your client and that’s cute, but you “dont’ fight for the middle-aged black woman with an attitude and a drinking problem. It’s not worth the risk.” GAAAAAAHHTDAYUM!
- CeCe stopped by Mary Jane’s house unannounced. She got her address off of the personal check Mary Jane wrote her at the hospital. She showed her the photocopy she made of it. Mind you, the memo read: “I’m sorry.” CeCe pointed out that the sentence could be seen as an admission of guilt. Umph, umph, umph. She also had MJ’s lab report and pretty much threatened to leak it. For MJ to carry the bat to the door with her all the time, she should’ve made use of that mug. That was the time. Anyway, CeCe wanted $25,000 from MJ. That money is her blessing. I guess the other money she got from SNC wasn’t. When MJ thought she could throw out the nondisclosure agreement to shut CeCe down, CeCe revealed that the document she signed didn’t protect MJ from legal action – only SNC (her employer). Oop! The “white folks” didn’t look out for her after all. CeCe kept wavering between sista-girl and money-hungry-bish, and MJ was looking like:
- Network made plans to replace her. They threw around the idea of having a new black woman. When Kara told her, she urged them to hire another black anchor – the ugliest black woman they could find. Nope. They got “J-Lo Junior” to sit in. MJ hated on her, saying she was all makeup and no substance. On the contrary, CeCe watched an episode of the show with her and said MJ should be worried. Oh, and if she wanted her job back she needed to go take it back. “J-Lo Junior” was was prolly posting Instagram pics from her chair already.
- In another conversation with ol’ CeCe, MJ delivered an appropriate read. She called her a lazy negro (like the ones they were just discussing) because instead of figuring out a way to get her own money, she’d rather take MJ’s. But don’t get it twisted. CeCe is quick to spit out statistics and facts. She’s highly intelligent. Shady as hell and untrustworthy, but intelligent.
- MJ got her shit together, applied some foundation, shimmied into a tight dress, threw on some shades, and strutted her ass into work. She interrupted a meeting the staff was having with the fill-in. Guess who was bizzack. #BawseAssBitch
I initially fell in love with this series because I see a lot of myself in Mary Jane. I appreciate her flaws because I recognize my own. I root for her in situations that may be inappropriate at times. But damnit, if she’s happy in the moment, I usually am, too! Because: human.
Outside of my love for Mary Jane’s character, I appreciate how the show addresses current issues in a real way. The characters say the stuff we say in every day conversations – right, wrong, or totally fucked up. I. love. it.
- Shout out to smart, funny, witty, writing. YES, GAWD!
- Dear Makeup Artists: You DID that.
- Dear Mara Brock Akil: Werk, lady!
- Shout out to Loretta Divine for playing the hell out of that role, and giving us a character we haven’t seen from her over the years. I genuinely have an almost-like/hate relationship with her character right now. That’s a sign of great acting.
- Mama MJ running into that glass had me CRINE!!!
- CeCe wiping off her sneakers before she got in the car? #done LOLOLOL!
- “Lick-her license” had me in tears, too. Ha!
- I miss Omari.
Catch BEING MARY JANE on BET Tuesdays at 9 pm EST