RHOA: Messy in Miami

S8, Ep6  Bienvenido A Miami

Room For All

  • Shamea was already at the house in Miami when the rest of the ladies arrived. AND she had already picked out her room. Lucky for her, she didn’t pick the best room. They were all ready to set her ass straight. (I’m still trying to figure out exactly who she is and what her purpose is, but whatever.)
  • The ladies agreed that Kandi should get the master bedroom. Because: pregnant.
  • Kim decided she didn’t want a room, even though there was one available to her. She was good with sleeping on the couch with a big TV in front of her.

“Tea” Party

  • Of course Kenya had to tell Sheree what Tammy said about her before they spent the day on the boat at Lake Lanier. What would a girls getaway be without a little shit-starting?
  • Sheree poured us some tea about why Tammy would feel some type of way about her. She boned Bob. (At least that’s what he said…allegedly.) Oop!
  • Cynthia revealed that she and Peter were making progress.
  • Sheree jumped things off at the dinner table and asked what Tammy’s problem was with her. Tammy stayed #teamBob, prompting Sheree to ask in front of everyone if she’d slept with Bob. Of course Tammy said no. In fact, she was like there’s nothing physically attractive about him. (Shhhaaaaaade.)
  • Kim couldn’t handle it. She couldn’t believe grown-ass women were going back and forth about who liked the other. Her face was all, WTF??
  • Then Kim posed this question to Kenya – I mean, to everyone: Is there a difference between information and instigation? Kim Fields


Turn Up!

  • Kim was outside having morning devotions while lounging on the chaise. (For real, she was listening to gospel music and getting her life.)
  • Kenya was talking shit about Kim to Sheree, basically saying Kim tried her at dinner. Let Kenya tell it, Kim didn’t want those kinda problems with her. (Sidebar: Picking on Kim Fields is like bullying the quiet girl at school who gets straight As, always carries her bible and her physics book, and sits alone at the lunch table. She ain’t botherin’ nobody. She just wants everybody to act like grown-ass women. Let her be.)
  • Everyone (except Kandi) put on their barely-there swimwear, took a yacht and went to party. Kandi wasn’t feeling too well. Because: pregnant.
    Porsha and Phaedra
    Photo courtesy of BravoTV.com

    (I was reminded why I need to hit the gym again because the ladies looked great.)

  • During the party at the bar, Kim left the group and had a breakdown, talmbout she missed her husband. She said she didn’t “get it.” She didn’t understand girls dancing with each other or just sitting there watching everyone else have fun. Basically, she didn’t know how to have a good time – whatever that would mean for her. And that’s just it. She doesn’t know how to have a good time without her family.
  • While talking about husbands, Phaedra said she’s still angry with Apollo, but she would be able to relate to how Kim felt if he was a good husband, too. Apollo-Edward-Nida-mugshot-32126798.223x223
  • After their therapy session, Phaedra and Kim rejoined the group. Everyone was there except Tammy. Nobody knew where she was.

Harpo, Who Dese People?

  • Porsha had two fine Latino men at the table. “Hers” was named Oliver. She met him at the bar where Kim had her meltdown. (Duke who???)
  • Tammy returned to the table with two young men. One is her nephew who was/is/trynabe in the NBA. The other was Nephew’s friend.
  • Back on the yacht (where all the strangers were invited) Porsha jumped off a game of “Never Have I Ever.” We all know where that leads when males and females play together.
  • It was apparent that NBA-ish Nephew dude is gonna be a problem because he checked Kenya for snapping her fingers at him. I get it, but if he didn’t want to be on a boat with a bunch of older women, he could’ve stayed where he was. Seems the snapping of fingers gave him a flashback of sorts. Something tells me this is the beginning of the fuckery.


  • I REALLY want them to have a full cast of married women. You know, real housewives.
  • I find it interesting that Cynthia was cracking jokes about “kicking it” and clarifying that she didn’t mean it like how she kicked Porsha; but Porsha was almost kicked off the show because violence wasn’t tolerated.
  • That Tammy seems super shady.

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