GRAMMYs 2016

Okay. Let me run this back.

  • Taylor Swift opened the show. She opens every award show. I look for her to be the opening act for the BET Awards and Black Girls Rock next. Hell…
  • Kendrick Lamar won the first award! And it looks like he shaved and got his hair freshly braided!
  • The Weeknd performed. I didn’t love it. I don’t love him. But a lot of people do.
  • Robin Thicke looked to be seen with his new boo, but maybe she is his cousin. Or maybe she isn’t new. I haven’t paid much attention since he stopped crying over Paula. #noassumptions
  • Andra Day made me proudER to be a Black woman. She graced the stage looking like Ella Fitzgerald during this here Black History Month and sang “Rise Up.” I bet all the ancestors are standing like this: Spike
  • The Lionel Richie tribute!!! John Legend, Demi Lovato, Luke Bryan, Meghan Trainor, and Tyrese! (Demi’s outfit was EV-ER-Y-THING.) I enjoyed it. I expected some different artists to pay tribute, but I’m not mad about it. Well… Maybe I’m a little mad about Luke Bryan.
  •  Stevie Wonder’s people still don’t love him for real. Because: Braids. And attire.
  • But his brief performance with Pentatonix in tribute to Earth, Wind, & Fire was cool. So was his shout out to making everything accessible to people with disabilities. He teased that no one else knew the winner because the card had braille on it.
  • Kendrick rapped in shackles and then broke free and glowed in the dark. And then there was fire. He owned the special effects for the night.
  • Bruno Mars came out looking like a purple pocket-sized pimp and introduced Adele.
  • I fell in my feelings by accident, playing with Adele. She sang “All I Ask,” and had me in the fetal position much like my reaction to “I Can’t Make You Love Me.” She was prepared to murder the song, but the sound was jacked up. She later tweeted about the piano mics falling onto the keys and making things sound out of tune. I felt horrible for her as I watched her strain to hear herself and find the note at times. She still did great in spite of the bullshit – just not “Adele great.”
  • Justin Bieber came out and crooned a new rendition of “Love Yourself.” I was all in. His “Where Are U Now” vocals were meh, though. BUT, that’s my son-in-law, so…
  • Sam Smith looks like Boy George’s son, but I’m not quite put-off by it. Yet. He’s kinda cute – definitely cuter than before.
  • Rihanna didn’t perform per her doctor’s orders. Risk of hemorrhaging her vocal chords. I’d say that’s an excused absence. I heard she planned on performing my JAYUM, “Kiss it Better,” too. Damnit!
  • The tribute to B.B. King was soulful and bluesy, just like it should have been.
  • Lady GaGa had full reign to be her old, quirky self, since she did the David Bowie tribute. She was a perfect fit.
  • Taylor Swift won album of the year and basically said Kanye didn’t make her famous. Hard work did. She won three awards total, I think.
  • I was expecting a Run D.M.C. tribute because they received the Lifetime Achievement Award.. But nope. (Unless that happened when I dozed off.)
  • Natalie Cole didn’t get a tribute. They could’ve at least had someone sing “Unforgettable.” Shady asses.
  • Ed Sheeran won.
  • I was perplexed by the lyrics of Little Big Town’s “Girl Crush.” I’m going to study them and get back to y’all.
  • That’s basically it.
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